DISQUS

AngelaChanning · 1 year ago

I don't mean to sound like someone who does not use facts to back up their opinions, but I have often wondered if constant exposure to video games, TV and other electronic stimuli contributes to hyperactivity as well. I know some child development experts are now saying no TV at all until after age3 or higher. The other issue is that iPods are causing hearing loss in some folks. (I keep thinking I would love to get an iPod but I just keep forgetting to get one. LOL) Thank you for listening.

OlderAndWiser · 1 year ago

OK, I don't own a cell phone, because I'm as connected as I want to be already. (Although I'm still looking for a used one for 911 use in a REAL emergency.) I'm also a different kind of feminist--not one who puts everything else on the back burner while her "career" gets the lion's share of her energy.

Having said that, apart from the scientific reports, it's pretty apparent that most people just cannot give their babies the kind of physical engagement which results in bonding and a feeling of security, such as cuddling, rocking, talking, training, that parents used to provide. This is because of separation due to having to return to work after 2 weeks of giving birth and being absent for the greater part of the child's day for women. A daycare provider or nanny just does not do for a small child what a parent can do--whether mother or father, the kind of intimate bonding, loving attention and care a baby needs. Even parents (mainly mothers) in far less sophisticated and "developed" countries know, from instinct, that children need this kind of development. An absent parent, or one too engaged in other activities to pay attention to the child ("quality time" or not, which I always thought was a farce) cannot have a meaningful involvement with their child. I"m not talking about total "control" here, I'm talking about fully bonding with your child. You cannot do it in absentia.

My son made the point once that people who want kids should get a dog first--if the dog is well adjusted after a couple of years, your child will probably be as well. Neglected dogs don't make good companions.

I'm not being hypocritical here--I was a working mother, very conscientious of the time I spent with my kids--but I realize that it was never enough time, no matter how much I tried to make up for my absence--and I might have been poor and broke when they were babies, but I refused to go back to work for as long as possible. It's horrible that people in this country are forced to either go broke or bond with their kids...and we are paying the price for that, as well. What other nation in the world has the scope of mental disorders (even "separation anxiety" is classified that way) that the US has?

In a truly civilized country, both parents would get at least 6 months "baby time" from work to bond with their kids...and a gradual phasing in of work as the child gets older. We need to lower the speed limit for ourselves and ensure that people have a decent way to live--for the sake of future generations. We've screwed up enough kids already in the pursuit of the so-called material "good life" which isn't doing our kids any good whatsoever. We've made them self-centered, greedy and contemptuous of us in too many ways by throwing things at them and not giving them our time, which is more essential to development than any designer baby clothes or the Iphone or a Mustang at 16.

jjoann · 1 year ago

Could it also be true that parents who spend too much of their time on the phone have poorly behaved kids?! Seriously, The problem is not the technology, it's the indulgence. Children expect (and get) so much more stuff and input than they need. Unfortunately, this is our generation of parents' legacy to our children. Children need limits, boundaries and lots of them. Parents who allow 24/7 access to video/computer/phone/ipod are the problem. Thanks, mother of 2 boys ages 9 & 13.

OlderAndWiser · 1 year ago

BTW, I tried being as fair and equal as possible with my 2 sons--but the one I spent the most baby time with, breastfeeding, cuddling, lots of attention--is the one with whom I bonded most--and the one with whom I now live and who will make sure I have what I need in my old age. Loving care is a wonderful thing--it results in loving, caring adults. We see the opposite results in nursing homes and "senior housing" all over America--the American sense of "independence" drawn to its obvious conclusion.

OlderAndWiser · 1 year ago

jjoan, of course! The whole idea of the SUV is to park your kids in the back, with videos and other distractions, while the parent drives and talks on the phone--not, perhaps having a smaller, greener vehicle in which you can engage your kids in a calm way and enjoying the outing. Ever wonder why traffic is so frenetic? Everyone is engaged in doing 3 or 4 things at one time...

jr · 1 year ago

quick fixes lead to long term problems

badger3k · 1 year ago

I'm skeptical that it was the phone use during pregnancy and not the fact that the story suggests the kids used phones before the age of 7. That alone suggests a problem with the family life - who the heck is a 6 year old calling, and why? Giving kids a phone is a horrible idea, and suggests that the parents do not have time for the kids (for whatever reason) and the phone becomes the babysitter (like tv). I'm also skeptical of the study, although I would like to look at it if I could - the use of self-reporting over a past time period (which is what it sounds like they did) is horribly innaccurate. If the study is any good, they would monitor the participants throughout pregnancy and into the first years of life, and keep written records of phone use. People's memories are bad as is, and depending on how a survey is done, the answers can be directed to a goal in how the questions are phrased.

Another question, did they look at the childhood of the parents to see how they behaved as children? We get our basic tendencies from both genes and environment, and if the parents had behavioral problems as kids, it stands that their children will as well. Somehow, I am skeptical that this was looked at, but then this is probably not a definitive study, and I would bet that the conclusions of the authors are not exactly the way they are phrased in the article - which often happens in science reporting these days - the reporter rarely understands the science and is looking for a headline that will sell.

The better way was done with several studies on cell phone use, one of which lasted 10 years and found a minor (but significant) increase in the chance of brain tumor for those who use cell phones a lot for 10+ years. Another study did not find such a risk, but if more studies are done we can get better information. For now, the safest would be to use headsets when the phones are needed.

badger3k · 1 year ago

Edit - Reread the article, and the writer wasn't bad. They did bring up the author's caution that they did not look at other reasons, and the part that there does not seem to be a biological mechanism for use on the mother's part. They did not mention that use of phones by children is not a good idea for the radiation exposure to developing brains, which definitely is a biological mechanism, but I still think that there are probably other factors at work that have more of an effect than actual cell phone use.

badger3k · 1 year ago

Sorry for a third post, but I saw this: more problems with cell phone use and wanted to share: (http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2008/05/a_wor...)